It’s Like That and Like This, and Like That And Uh…
I do apologize for my lack of posting as of late, and thanks to Natalie for “kindly reminding” me to “get that shit updated” everyday 6th period. So I guess this ones free since it took me so long, and its lookin kinda cold, but hey man heres what I got, something pretty nifty to BEHOLD:
Randy turned 17 yesterday, festivities were held for him at the local Chevy’s, seven seats taken, 42 enchiladas consumed. While we were waitin for the table, curiosity warranted a visit to the neighboring “Dollar Twenty-Five Store” where we tried on nasty ass shades that made Russel look like emo trash. Vinny tried on this really cute hat that made me blush, Ruff found a great deal on crazy knockoff cereal, than Vinny posed with a ceramic primeape. Mexican food is the shit, bigass sombreros are the shit, and the agua con lemon is real real bueno tambien. That’s that.
I took my camera to school the other day, took time to stand with mi amigas, I rubbed this Fu’s head, felt great too, brings me good luck. I saw my Fijian amigo, Leonard in the halls, gave him the nod, and you better believe he nodded back. I was content to be greeted by my brudda Jahred and Ana was hella jealous but she still managed to sneak in the picture with Angela and the babies daddy Tony. Paid my daily respects to Whamo, holy moly he’s a cool cat…Not long after, we took some of the baddest G-D- M & Effin Crew shots, shit man we even took a third one to grow on and take notice of Jason’s hand location and that of my right nipple…Creepy to say the least. But uh if you wanna see all the photos I’ve takin at school, click this.
I guess it was the same night as all these pimpass photos were takin at school some peeps ended up at my pad..At first it was jus me and the Pinkster, we were up to no good really, bustin the shit outta lemons with wimpy baseball bats, but all Pinky could do was try to ram his bat up my arse but whatever, I wasn’t even complaining really…Kelly Natalie, Ashley and Eebsies came over too. We went to go Jam outside at the church, maybe even get a lil jammin in but I dint want the females gettin all cold and shivery and what not and they did insist on rockin my old water polo jacket so I let Kelly rock it while Natalie and I resorted to “reverse sagging” a fashionable technique I perfected quite some time ago and still stands the test of time. Matt and Kelly got close like Rosie Odonnels thighs for a sec long enough for me to snappa pic, than I plucked my lucille behind her back, she liked it. Kelly and Natalie frollocked and skipped across the wet church grass in the dead of night to conjure the most evil of spirits cause they’re crafty like that. Welp..than it was time to say goodbye to Miss Kelly and Miss Natalie, except..oh wait..silly Kelly! your car is covered in saran wrap!, surely you mean not to drive with such an obstruction! Ahh yess the whole S.O.B. was covered from head to tire that shit sucks, funny to look at though.
The next day you ask about? You mean that scenic drive we took in Matty’s god damn Lexus? Is that what your referring to? Where we stopped up top near the most scenic of views, crept up next to my ear and whispered “hey look over there dude“? You want me to speak about how nervous I felt passing by this gang of assless chaps-wearing, flem spewing, motorcycle riding ladies and gents? Talk about how Ebert pointed his finger at that old lady in the distance? Cause if your asking me all that, than your crazy if you think imma answer :P.
Well nows the time in the post when I realize that I totally neglected to stick in all the pics we took and I make a mad dash to shove everything in. So here goes: This cat climbed up on the roof I give a very little fuck about how its dumbass gets back down. Meg frickin met Jack Johnson, Julia shoulda, so imagine my shaking my fist in very disaproving manner. I got much love for the Arias’s Juans mi amigo for sure. Pinky made this, and Natalie wrote this
BEHOLD THE RETURN VIDEOS (NOW WITH SOUND!)!!!!
Alex Singing Smurf Song – Fahaad rapping in Pakastani – Pinky and me Dancing – Evan Tater Tot Video 1 – Evab Tater Tot Video 2 – Me Jumping in Cold Pool – Fruitball!!
Alex Singing Smurf Song – Fahaad rapping in Pakastani – Pinky and me Dancing – Evan Tater Tot Video 1 – Evab Tater Tot Video 2 – Me Jumping in Cold Pool – Fruitball!!
No morestuffs today, just make sure you check out ALL the videos esp the Jam, the pool jumping into and the Fruitball. That it all.
In H.I.M. We Trust
H.I.M. show last night, pops and I got dressed up to look like bad muthafuckas, although I was feelin kinda downshifted that I couldn’t find any dark eye makeup or black silks to put on :/. But its all bueno cause my dad went the whole night with his shirt tucked in. I tried to rep the heartagram as hard as I could, but once we got there it looked like everyone else had beet me to the repping..lotta skinny white guys in tiny black H.I.M. shirts. Whatever though man, pops and me…we was rockin. Doors opened at 7:00, show started at 8:00 with these guys, kinda reminded me of the puppet things that sing at Chuckie Cheeses, except they weren’t as talented and they didn’t have skee-ball :P. They were pretty bad and no one clapped so he ended his set early and ran for cover backstage before his mechanical bandmates were massacred by the sea of scrawny goth kids with mythical daggers and demons blood could get to em. Second act, Program the Dead kicked a good amount of ass, some clean guitar licks and the singer could wail. They had a couple good tunes, I liked this one in particular so click it to download it.
9:48, the lights go out, purple and pink lights illuminate the stage and you could see the bigass heartagram logo being pulled down from the raptors as if it were a gift from hay-zeus himself! And there stood Ville Valo in all his glory…They opened with “Buried Alive by Love” which blew me away, and than every song jus got better and better, Ville’s voice seemed to stretch from Shaq to Cher, yeh man, he’s jus that damn good. The keyboard guy thought he was hot shit since he could play everything with one hand, Linde tore his axe up like a hobo anda ham sammich! All the riffs were heavy and full of metal goodness, good ol fasion Finnish metal man, thats what its all about…love metal.
So needless to say the show was a damn good one, if H.I.M. ever comes to your city or redneck town I strongly suggest throwin down the twenty bucks or whatever currency rednecks use to pick up a pair of tickets for you and your livestock.
Earlier that day I went grocery shoppin with my mutha, something I have not done in a buncha weeks, months maybe. Went at like 2 in the afternoon so I still had the pillow imprint on my head and slippers on my nakedass feet. Oh did I mention it was safeway? Cause it was.. Anywhoo, all the shoppin around for milk and cereal got me jonesin for a bigass sammich to consume with my bigass mouth. I strut over to the deli and ask the gent for a sammich to satisfy my He-Man hunger, so what does he charge me 5.99 for? How bout this pussified excuse for a turkey sammich, I mean…jus look at this, now this could mean two things…1. I have a VERY white hand, or 2. Safeway makes the most pussified sandwiches ever that don’t even taste good. The End.
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Girls Who Visit Coastal Shores
First and foremost I wanna know if you know jus saw how much ass Atmosphere really kicks…Have you heard this track? If not, I demand that you click it lika professional clicker and download it. Jahhh brahhh its dat good.
These two ladies had a lovely outing at the beach the other day, and my friendly photography correspondent Ashley Slocum captured some of the good times. Here gazes Emilylookin into the deep blue yonder, and here squats Ashley acting like she can’t get any blonder. HAH! Rhymes! And exclamation marks! And check out this kickass NBHQ dedication, hell yes, keep up the wonderful work ladies.
Now that I got that out of the way, I gotta rant and vent about how lame one of my neighbors is. First off lemme give you a little backround on the guy, he moved in about…less than a year ago im guessing which makes him a fresh fucking fish in this “community” that we live in. He’s old but not eldery, freakishly tall, (about six-foot fifteen im guessing) and on many occasions has offered to babysit. I can remember one time I could hear his T.V. blaring from downstairs and when I went to go check what he was watchin, cause im snoopy like that, and I stumbled upon this! Now that we established that he’s a frickin freak, (frick to the max), check out this letter he pinned up at like 5 different places in the building. “Footprints in the community,” yeh I bet he likes feet too, maybe he’ll appreciate one size 14 footprint up his colon! I don’t know why this bothers me so, I jus think its a dick move to bitch about shit like that, I gotta deal with the hippopatamus upstairs that makes the ceiling creak, the barking dog who swings larger testicles than this shitstick. And if im the “bass sound” that he speaks of than thats even more of a dick move, fuckin “day sleepers” can kiss my gorilla ass and getta job. Eat my bass jerkoff. Rant Completed.
Saw my dawg, Randy, at my school today when he shoulda been at is, creepin up in his blackass regal, like a big ol..stealth bomber, cept loud, and not stealthy. I tried one of those crest brush-up things too, ya know the lil strip you put on your finger and rub your teeth with? I gotta praise the guy from Asia who thought that up, and I gotta give props to the American s.o.b. who jacked his idea and overprised it. Only reason I got it was cause that bigass Travis had about infinity samplers in his makeup bag. Lucky me, my grill feels spectabulous!
Oh and another thing! Much to my dismay and I mean MUCH, my damn iPod is full! No more space, 15 gigs filled up, am I the first person in the universe to ever do this? Cause if I am I want a medal, no joke, with lil diamonds that spell out my name, filled with crystalf. Bitches, and when I day, I wanna how I wanna go out.
I don’t have much to say about the new layout, haven’t made a lotta progress on it, busy I guess, gonna go see H.I.M. tommorow night, hell yes! Lotta concerts in the next month or so, PEPPER! (will be soooo goodd), Atmosphere (hopefully), and Zion-I. Wow good times ahead. But about the layout, I still don’t really know how to go about it, more input would be appreciated, hah that’d make a funny slogan for a pair of undies haha. Anyway I fixed the guestbook so that you can finally add a pic in there, so go sign it AGAIN…domo arigato bitches.
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The Goblets of Rock Were Raised!
Yeh well I hope you know this is the third time im typin this sonofabitch post out, I accidentally closed the damn thing twice already, rabbits foot don’t fail me now! So lotta haps in the past few days love bein busy tho knaw mean? Anyway, Kai and I, we was chillin at my palace, really up to no good, he was in the front room gettin his pater walo skills on with my big black ball while I was in my room, tryin on lingerie. This went on for far too long until Eebshit us up, hard, apparently he wasn’t the only with the jones in his bones for rockin. It was rainin out, but we don’t have a very high combined brain cell count, I had my guitar strapped round my neck slippin and slidin down muddy declines while Kai tooka leak, that’s a hot pic huh? Whatever, freaks…got to Eebs, ran the last part with my axe swingin like…testicles..or something, which were also wet. Jay Kay. Anywhoo all I had was my acoustic so I had to compete with the awesome power that is the strat / marshall amp combo!. And with its powers combined! We were rockin like beasts! It was mad good times man, I got all black and white, seemed to catch on too, cause eebs got it too!. Hell man it was addictive, Kai himself tried to get in on the mix, but he needed a little pat on the rear to get his little ninja ass in gear! Soon enough it was like a collective jam 18 strings in the mix, 6 hands workin overtime to find that rhythym so that Eebs could ignite it with his flaming solo, and I was doin my hardest to lay down the fly rhythym. Battling axes man, me then Eebs, yeh we was jammin alright jammin hard, and that was that.
Jus realized I haven’t been to Pinky’s in some days, that’s no good like I said, Imma busy bia and dontcha ferget iot. Went to the gym with my pops yesterday, I made him lay straight across the benchpress structure and I repped him a couple of times, no biggy. Yeh, oh did I mention he left the keys in the ignition and locked us out of the car? Our phones were in the car too, remember that low brain cell count I mentioned earlier? Well its hereditary. We walked home from the YMCA, a good hour and a half speed walk, with my pops thighs squeaking together all the while, but it’s cool cause I was too, coulda started a fire with them things, or at least make some sweet cricket music. Got home to a locked door, oh did I mention my dad left the keys in the fucking car?? So I had to hope my girth-alicious gluteous maximus through my dink ass window. Whatta day hmm?
I was talkin to Ash the other day, apparently, after falling victim to dumbass-itis she finally got her pics on her digital camera to transfer onto her computer, and I share some with you now: heres that one of me and ash where I got a faded smile, TEE HEE ^_^. heres that one of me carrying miho cause she was takin a little nap at Eebsies new years bash. Actually all these pics Ash sent me are a few months old, but far from stale! Heres a crew shot of me and my drinkin buddies. I like this pic cause Matty boy is a lil seepy himself, oh how cute! Speakin of kizzute, heres Eebs and Kelly and Eebs and Meg, quite simply precious!
So todays Monday, some holiday? Maybe? All I know is it’s hella nice outside and I got about infinity assloads of homework I gotta do now while all the other boys and girls play jacks outside :(. All is bueno though, this was pretty the best weekend ever, I have a very deep appreciation for scary movies, huffalump mutha fucka!
Before I leave you all, wanna let ya know that the rumors are true; I am sorta workin on a new layout for the site, I think imma keep the whole dropdown menu thing cause I’ve got nothing but positive feedback about it, but if you wanna be a jerk guy and talk some schmack feel free to e-mail me at [email protected] and say it to my inbox bia! Azn Fury himself suggested I go in a orange and blue direction, and I know better than to get on his bad side, so I’m thinkin NBHQ is orange/blue bound. Keep checkin back for updates and sign my guestbook again 🙂
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