Weather is Sweet, Make You Wanna Move Your Dancing Feet
Well, well, well, thought I was gonna leave ya’ll high and dry, postless and weeping! Ya’ll thought wrong and clever and covertly I deliver, while you are all dreaming and sleeping. Luau dance last night, symbolizing another year of high school coming to an end. Encouraging students to celebrate their last hoorah accordingly and “emphase butt to crotch, or crotch to crotch” dancing skills while gettin our “grope” on knowing full well that “hands should remain off the floor during dancing.”
Miss Ashley was kind enough to offer her abode as a beautification location and even supplied us all with mouth-watering, sausage ( jus what Eebs ordered ). Though it was far from a sausage-fest, lassies out the ass! Why heck! I dun even got me summa dem ladyfolk to dun do my dew so I don’t look like no foo. Meg looked constipated, but dashing nonetheless, Ryder musta rode in on the pretty train cause she looked nice, Natalie, shown here soon before she kept shit fresh with Sugar-Free Orbitz gum. Don’t think we didn’t pose though, cause we did, I’m talkin a lot, like…amultidude of pose shots. I posed with that Meg girl, I posed with my boy Eebs, posin everywhere…
Dusk was soon upon us and we began our short stroll up to the school, taking bitchin pics along the way, of course. Eebs and I employed our sheer size and imposing demeanor to power our way to the front of the line, ensuring our female company wouldn’t have to wait so long thus having more time to shake what they mommas gave em. The line was were it was at anyway lotta familiar faces, you know im down with NPC, ( cause you know me ), my boys : John & JoJo, oh and, you remember the rumors about this guy at that one dance? — There true. Damn Greeks.
After shootin the shit with my buds and buddettes for some quick minutes, we made it inside the outside, caught up with my comrade Cahill and his gal, Joyce, spotted Pinky’s girl, and even took a second pic that would put picasso to shame. Hella heads last were there I do declare, Carlos rated quite high on the pimp-o-meter, as did my boy, Fej. The setting sun made for some pretty righteous shots. Twas a nice dance indeed, I dig Luaus, and pigs, and hot straight-haired girls ;). I gotta say, it was a good dance, and I have a confession…JoJo emptied his piss gun on your lawn, sorry bias.
So I was gonnna make a whole post about this some days ago but lazyness got the best of me and here I am stuffin your little faces with it here and now. So CSM / College of San Mateo, hosted a free lil concert open to anyone who could afford the price of a ticket. They call it the Electronic Music Show cause it was kinda like a presentation of all the final projects of students enrolled in Electronic Music 101, which is cool, cause, I like things. Of course I invited miss Nat Queen Cole, and yes she is the same girl whose cholar bone I busted :S. The real reason I went was to go see Carlos’s band, Extinction or somethin, I wanted to get those guys on film. Instead, I ended up filmin a bittle lit of a bunch of the acts and I share the video with you now :
Oh, remember how I said I ran the Bay to Breakers? Well, in case there are any skeptics, check out the proof. These pics were takin with the cameras mounted at the 6 and 7 mile marker along with the finish line. Heres one more of me tryin to rep the NBHQ beater as hard as I can, and I do think those people behind me are nekked. thats my pops. This is a duck-billed platypus and thats a naked ass bear.
My pools heated, Pinky brought his sunburned ass neck over. He had the new Star Wars flick on DVD, so we watched that, I thought it was lotsa awesome. Although I’m not as big of fan as Sanchez here I made the nastiest smoothie ever, strawberries and milk…you’d think that be like…a milkshake or somethin right? Well no one told me it jus turned into chunky pink liquid ass. Ya live and learn. Anyway, one of Pinky’s many hidden talents is his insane ability to beatbox, like no one else that I know, so we made lil flick to showoff his skills :
– NBHQ History
– girlfriend fight simulator
– amish porno
– crazy ass star wars merch
– Darth Vader Can Read Your Mind!
Bay To Breakers : 2005
Woke up, got up near 7 O’clock threw on my runnin attire and BART’ed and MUNI’ed into the city con mi padre. For those unfamiliar with BART Train, MUNI Bus, and other archaic forms of public transportation lemme lay it down for ya illigits right quick : You have a tedious game of “tug-the-dollar” with the ticket machine till it shits out a lil blue ticket that grants you access to the BART train. I’ve never met this BART guy before, but I hope he knows people piss in his train and fart in his seats. As for Mr. Muni, he must be aware that some of his riders reek of P’tuli. Anyway, enough digression…We got off BART at a quarter after 8:00, which meant that we were 10 minutes late, years from the start line, and the Kenyans were prolly already halfway finished.
One of the coolest things about Bay To Breakers is the fatty tortilla fight ( video 7 mb ). This year I was sure to come prepared, oh and notice the bitchin NBHQ beater, custom made by my pops. Yeh thats right, my pops, slash running buddy, slash temp photographer ( he took all the pics this year, so if they suck it’s his fault ). After my 50 tortillas were hurled into the sea of runners like stones in a big smelly pond, I tried to penetrate the masses, and believe me when I say there was an assload of people, and by assload, I mean assload!, 60,000 easy. Everyone has bib numbers with mad digits, I was 39,361 and my pops was 39,362, the Kenyans had numbers 1-7…fancy that.
8:45 – we cross the starting line, tens of thousands of people in front of me, and tens of thousands behind me, including my dad ;). The first mile or so is really a crawl cause of all the drunkin staggering irish and slow batches that jus get in the way of me, Mister Speedy Gon-fucking-zales. Speakin of which, peep this broad throwin up the M-E-X, in yo face! Pope was there, he really is a down to earth guy, which is comforting to know cause…pope on a rope, thats why. Heres a guy on stilts, how bout that eh? Once again, my dad took these so… ;P. Once I broke through the “Human Wall” and got to the second mile or so I was makin some damn good time, passin bias up with the quickness, powered up Hayes Hill and carefully even ran down it, ( thank you to Eebs for the downstair training ). Mile 5 : I ran paste the buffalo in Golden Gate Park, thought I was trippin out after I saw a group of people in dead fish costumes dancing in unison. Gravity starts to push a little harder at Mile 6 and you can cook an egg on my tits, or hatch one in my armpit only to die by the fumes. After I saw the 7 mile mark I sprinted it, realizing that the Kenyans had probably finished half an hour ago and my dad was prolly callin a cab by now. And so I finished, came in 9855th place ( checked online ) with a time of like 1:50, but ya know…we dint really start till like 40 mins into the race…either way, my dad beat me last year, and this time round I beat him by half an hour and he got 19220th place. The student has become the teacher old man…
Went to Footstock afterwards, lookin to meet up with my LONG LONG lost dad, and grab some meat on a stick. Twas an eversweet reunuion indeed, poppa recollected seein some naked people and gettin the camera out to exploit and capture the beauty! He got himself a kick out of it, aint nothin but an old meng thang.
Kisses my stompers for gettin me through such a trek with minimal blistering, and picked some ORANGE flowers sweet like someone I know ;). Got on Mr. MUNI’s bus and headed home, to deliver some flowers ;).
Click here to see all the pics from Bay to Breakers 2005 (49 pics)
Click here to see all the pics from Bay to Breakers 2004 (25 pics)
Click here to see all the pics from Bay to Breakers 2004 (25 pics)
– Crasy ish with legos
– Babes
– Kelly Osbourne – Big girl
– False alarm : Chappelle not crazy
– German Addicting Game – Submitted by Gio
– Click this for NBHQ
Lady Dons Go Out Strong
I’ve always been a fan of the ball of base. Chewin seeds, watching intently as the batter clicks his heels, blows a bubble, kicks the dust off the plate, winks at the ump, blows a kiss at the first baseman, backs out of the box, than takes a minute to tie his cleats, takes a few practice swings and repeats. Plus, what other sport has a seventh inning stretch? If that does’t wet your chops than I’m sure a sit in at an Aragon Varsity Softball game will do you right.
Friday night was the biggest game of the season, our ladies squared off against the cattle from Hillsdale. Spectators galore, crowd goin wild cheerin for Aragon High School? Or ASHley? You decide. Either way, Meg added exclamation to the proclamation and hollered hardcore. I don’t know what inning it was because Mr. Chateloupe (of Chanteloupe field) forgot to pay his PG&E, but Ash’ms herself belted that soft lil sphere into deep right and ran around a buncha bases, all the way home, sav to say the least. This guy immediately got on the horn, probably to inform everyone in town about Ashley’s monsterous HOME RUN. Meg and Emily took a quick break from the intense cheering to pose for a quickie, and…if you look closer you’ll notice a Hillsdale Knight Varsity softball players waste size amount of of familiar faces. Hellova Night.
Welp, got Bay to Breakers in the mornin, gotta get my rest if I wanna beat me a Kenyan tommorow. Lookin forward to seein a buncha old, sweaty, naked dudes runnin around me and maybe I’ll run into this cool cat again. I can only hope tonight and cringe tommorow.
Fixed the news sizing / alignment issues and also tidied up the comments form so it looks all nice and clean, hopefully encouraging some of you mutes to spit some ish on NBHQ. So why dontcha try it out after you munch of some links:
– words most one sided fights ( video )
– wheres waldo? text edition
– Chappelle gone crrrazy?
– insult generator
– pimp my grill
Denny’s Crew Resurrected
8:30 A.M. on Wednesday morning, May 11th 2005, while most little boys and girls across the country are dilligently working in there sweaty little classrooms, and suprisingly temperate portables, I was jus starting to part ways with my wonderful slumber. It takes me about two and a half rolls to get completely out of my double sized bed, and as my toes graze the shit-colored carpet I find out no one I know got killed in South Central, L.A., and shit man, I prolly wouldn’t even have to use my A.K…Today is a good day.
I guess I forgot to mention the reason why we got to mosey into school at 10:00 was due to our teachers and PTA ( the same PTA that supplied every classroom with shitty ass air muffins during STAR testing ) protesting the Governator’s proposal to cut sommore dead prez’s outta the budget for education. Needless to say, the student body was outraged, and myself along with my peers were no exception and felt that the only way we could civilly deal with the matter was to formally congregate over several plates of “Moons over my Hammy” at our our buddy “Denny’s” house.
Went to the Ninja’s house first, stared at his doors ( which are LOVELY by the way ) while he got his numchucks and katanas..Finally, he emerged brandishing his, camouflage-yellow ninja vest and traditional ninja-star satchel. After all weapons were accounted for, we went off to go meet up with Denny and the boys. We found Dallas and JoeJoe meticulously reviewing everything Denny-boy had to offer, Curran starred into space in a most profound manner while I immediately zoned in on the best effing dish at Denny’s. Leisurely and efficiently we consumed fluffly, buttermily pancake after pancake and we think Curran might have even had his way with one of em. And jus as fast JoeJoe inhaled his bacon we were outro, schoolbound, and late as fuck to class, Dennys-Style Bee-hatch.
Come to think of it– I still had my camera at school, and come to think about it even more, I remember snappin some! Fancy that. Here stands Leibs, my main meng, who’s kindness and grace is only exceeded by his freakish intellect. His Intelligence Quotient speaks for itself: 8,000. For god sakes, look at the ridiculously artistic photographs he takes of something as everyday as hot cheetos!. I know everyone knows my Fijian friend Leonard , Lenny, Fiji fuck, whatever, well I made this for his myspace. By the way, fuck MySpace and fuck YourSpace. And with that, I leave you with Mario, and a very special kung fu hump.
Peep this badass NBHQ dedication my number one fan drew on his folder, John Ferrel is the man. And Alisha sent this one in and theres like 30 or 7 more here.
Warning : This post is almost over and I still have a bunch of irrelevant pics I need to share so I shall do my best, here goes : Elephants makin the whoopee. Kitty in a shoe. Scary ass shit, and I hate poo.
Notice how the news is kinda…stickin out of the lines makin everything look borderline fucked up? This is because I upgraded the script to the newest version, fixes a lotta bugs and vulnerabilities makin NBHQ.NET way more secure than yesterday and jus as secure as tommorow! I will tweak it more so everything looks nice and less along the borderline of fucked up. And I’m runnin Bay to Breakers on Sunday, I plan on finishing before all of the Kenyans, so…wish me luck.
– Genius Company Name
– I’d prolly step on these by mistake
– Hella addicting game
– some other dude named cahill
– some other dude named brady wtf?!